Thursday, August 13, 2009

How to eat the same turkey sandwich for 88 days - Road Trip Recap



It is rather trite to start off my recap of the past three amazing months on the road by talking about what I ate for lunch every day. Food however is one detail I have managed to leave out of almost every previous blog; one detail I spent little time even thinking about. That brings me to my first point on how to eat the same turkey sandwich for 88 days.

1. Don’t think about it.

Never think too much about the turkey sandwich, especially when consuming it. Above all never think about how many previous turkey sandwiches you’ve consumed when trying to swallow that last bite. I don’t think I need to go into further detail here, but let me just say that those last bites are crucial to the hope of any future turkey sandwich consumption.

2. Check for freshness.

If you’ve eaten slimy turkey or moldy bread then you’ve just eaten your last turkey sandwich. If ever in doubt of the freshness inspect the bread for green spots and give the turkey a quick sniff before piling it on. In the case of moldy spots determine if the bread can be salvaged; often times it can – just be extra careful not to focus on this cost-saving move when eating the sandwich (refer to #1.)

I kept a cooler in the front passenger seat of my car and never went more than three days without replenishing the ice. I also kept two reusable grocery bags full of non-perishables, minus the bread and fruit. Surprisingly the bread lasted for weeks, even in the hot desert sun. As I observed this I thought back to all those one-hour long bread interviews I conducted with consumers and I cringed a little (if you didn’t know me during the course of conducting those interviews just know that I developed a strong and life-long aversion to talking about bread.)

3. Make it gourmet.

One way to disguise the fact that you are eating yet another turkey sandwich is to masque it with toppings. Remember that you may need a knife, a cutting surface and extra cooler space for fruit and vegetable toppings.

My default toppings were spinach, avocado, tomato, mayo and of course, cheese. Whether I used all or some of these ingredients depended on what I had on hand and what space I had for making the sandwich. One time I made the sandwich while still in the driver’s seat (parked) and was covered in tomato guts and globs of avocado. After that I made it a point to be standing up and cutting on a flat surface which was usually a picnic table or my cooler. I used a plastic cutting board that came with my mess kit and my pocket knife that I believe still has the hint of avocado lodged in its hinges.

4. Set the mood.

When eating your sandwich be sure to position yourself among pleasing scenery, away from adverse smells, loud noises, animals and unattractive people. If you satisfy your other senses while consuming the turkey sandwich, than your sense of taste isn’t the only one working and is less likely to reject the repetitious flavors.

I may be alone on this one, but setting is very important to me. For example I was walking around a street fair in Portland, OR with my friend Zack while eating a mediocre burrito. We stopped to look at hanging mobiles that dangled animal skulls and strips of animal skins. I quickly moved on past this booth and past a live llama until I was among relatively normal homemade crafts; only then could I enjoy my burrito again. My turkey sandwich was best enjoyed in nature, in solitude away from pit toilets, screaming children, highways and slobs.

5. Avoid windy beaches.

Although the beach setting may be a desirable place to consume a turkey sandwich, beware of wind and sand. A little sand in your mouth quickly kills the sandwich.

I made this mistake once while catching lunch on a beach just off of the coastal highway in California. The wind moved sheets of sand into my face and onto my sandwich. That was the one and only time I could not finish the whole thing.

6. Remember that you’re saving money.

As unappealing as it is, eating the same sandwich day-in and day-out saves money. A weekly grocery bill for the aforementioned ingredients (see #3) roughly amounts to $18, which is approximately $3 per day. This sure beats a $5 sandwich from a deli or a $10 meal from a restaurant; a cumulative savings of $176 or $616, respectively.

7. Be realistic.

Go out to lunch with others when you get an opportunity and be sure to sample the local flavor; taking a break from the turkey sandwich will help in the long run.

Truth be told I didn’t actually eat a turkey sandwich on all 88 days of my road trip, but I’m willing to bet I ate at least 60. It would have been rather awkward to whip out my own a sandwich while out at lunch with someone (okay, so I did this once at a cafĂ© at Mt Rushmore, but it was cafeteria-style seating, so somehow it felt less awkward.)

Some of my favorite lunches were in Austin when I had a big traditional Texan BBQ with a fellow couchsurfer, in San Francisco when I had my first tamale with Jamie, in San Diego when I had sushi with Elaina, in Virginia when Katy, Ryan and I had a block of smoked gouda to enjoy with our red wine on the back porch of a winery (I think that was lunch) and in North Carolina when Katy and I drove two hours out of our way to have lunch with my mom.

I had some other memorable meals too: The breakfast in Big Bend NP with the “road warriors” who taught me all about MREs and propane stoves; the brunch in Gretel's backyard Brooklyn cafe where we enjoyed tasty baked goods and played scrabble for 4 hours; the BBQ lunch in the zombie compound in Tacoma when the company I was with talked for nearly a half-an-hour about how to defend against a zombie attack; the dinner in Albuquerque with the couchsurfer who poured honey in the salsa; the dinner in Medicine Bow NF with Mike when I pieced together a tasty meal of rice, balsamic dressing, a poly-o mozzarella cheese stick and spinach; the dinner at Mesa Grill in Las Vegas before the Aerosmith concert when I ordered the most delicious and most expensive tuna steak; the desert of homemade blueberry pie and whiskey in Mt Rainier NP with bubbly campground neighbors and their park ranger friends; and the dinner in San Diego with Elaina and her friend and friend’s boyfriend when Elaina questioned the boyfriend’s painstakingly obvious big finger. In some cases the food was memorable but in most cases the company and conversation was unforgettable.

The people I crossed paths with are responsible for so much of the joy I experienced during my three months on the road. Over the course of the road trip I visited 15 friends, traveled with 3 friends, randomly ran into 4 acquaintances, met approximately 30 new (facebook) friends and chatted with a countless number of other travelers and locals. Whether it was catching up with an old friend or instantly bonding with a total stranger, my time spent with others was enormously satisfying. That’s not to say that I did not enjoy alone time or that everyone I met added to my joy. Some people I ran into could not be trusted. Instinctually I spent a great deal of time reading people and making cursory judgments about them. I aired on the side of caution in all my judgments and as a result ran into the woods to escape a pack of thugs in Kings Canyon NP and slept in my car to avoid being kidnapped by a couple of hicks outside of Canyonlands NP. I am surprised, relieved and delighted that these were my only real scares with people. The scare of Mother Nature is a whole different story.

I’ve never had a tolerance for bugs, a keen sense of direction or any common sense when it comes to outdoor survival skills, so when this road trip began I seriously doubted my ability to actually hike or camp alone. Katy brought me on my first camping adventure in the backwoods of Shenandoah NP during the middle of a severe thunderstorm. I was convinced that would be my first and last camping experience. We went camping again at a state park in South Carolina, which slightly redeemed the prior experience except for the raccoons that ate our food. About a week-and-a-half later I camped and hiked alone for the first time in Big Bend NP, which home to a healthy population of black bears. Luckily I didn’t see any bears, a scar that surely would have limited my future adventures. I am fortunate to not have encountered any bears on any of my hikes or at any campgrounds. My only bear citings were of black bear cubs sitting by the side of the road while I was sitting safely in my car. I also did not encounter any mountain lions, and the only wolf I saw was from my car, as it scurried across the road in Yellowstone NP. I was always cautious of these animals and analyzed every sound and slight movement in the distance to determine if I was in danger. Most often I discovered birds, deer and marmots to be the cause of such distractions. The other animals I had the pleasure of seeing in the wild include mountain goats, big-horn sheep, javelinas, a king snake, a rattle snake, elk, bison and mutated monster crickets. The crickets were the worst. I still have no tolerance for bugs.

Over time I developed better survival skills. On hikes I became keenly aware of the direction I came from and the direction I was going. I got in the habit of looking up to the sun to determine my direction and the time of day. At the start of a long hike or when debating whether to put on my rainfly I looked up to make sure there weren't any storms clouds moving in. Towards the end of my road trip when I developed a comfort of being outside at night I spent a great deal of time staring up into the black sky trying to make out constellations and catching my first ever “shooting stars.” As it turns out looking up at the sky is something I haven’t done very much of since I was a child and discovering it all over again brought with it a new sense of innocence. The sky bestowed upon me the most amazing weather throughout the course of the road trip. While everyone in the northeast suffered through dreary summer days I soaked up sunshine all across the rest of the country. The only adverse weather I encountered was a severe thunderstorm in Shenandoah NP, flooding in North Cascades NP, tornados in Devils Tower NM and extreme heat in Arches NP. Oh, and did I forget to mention that it was 115 degrees in Phoenix when I left to fly back to Boston?

That brings me to my next topic: a ranking of the best and the worst. I will start with the worst (I should note here that these picks do not necessarily align with the people I visited and/or met.)

Top three worst road trip stops:
1. Albuquerque, NM
2. North Carolina
3. Phoenix, AZ

Top 3 best road trip stops (cities):
1. Portland, OR
2. Austin, TX
3. San Francisco, CA

Top 3 best road trip stops (parks):
1. Zion NP (UT)
2. Mt Rainier NP (WA)
3. Bryce NP (UT)



Here's a detailed map of all 41 stops I made:









In three months I traveled down the eastern seaboard, skirted across the southern border, zigzagged my way up the west coast, hopped on over to Montana and meandered south through the mountains and deserts in Wyoming, South Dakota, Colorado, Utah and Nevada until I concluded my road trip in Phoenix. At some point during my travels out west I stumbled upon a brand new feeling: patriotism. To continue this thought I must breach my usual stance to not involve politics in my blogs. I believe that it was with incredible foresight that the National Park Service was created and that so many fragile and beautiful lands were preserved in this process. With that said I do believe that a more peaceful agreement could have been made with the American Indians who previously occupied such lands. In any case, there is so much beauty in this country; beauty beyond the lands of the NPS and beyond the soil of this country. I am thankful for my freedom; thankful that I have the ability as a single white female to travel alone across state borders. I infrequently worried about dangers posed by others and was instead greeted with jovial conversation. Although I am acutely aware of the dangers that lurk behind endless corners and the systemic flaws of this society I am at a new found peace with my fellow Americans.

This is perhaps the best attitude to bring with me to my studies in global business. My MBA program at Thunderbird begins in less than two weeks and I can barely believe it is here already. I can barely believe the road trip has come to an end. When I flew back to Boston I found myself at Sarah’s apartment, where I began the road trip. I laid down to rest on her couch and when I lifted my head I had, for the briefest moment, a fear that my road trip was just a dream. But it actually happened and the whole experience was way more amazing than I could ever have anticipated. I could not have been at such peace and with such a sense of adventure if I did not have set plans at the conclusion of the trip. So, in less than a week I fly back to Phoenix, move into my apartment and begin orientation on the 23rd. Although Phoenix appears in my top 3 worst road trip stops I have hope for the next 15 months. Who knows I may actually enjoy living in the desert after all. And after 15 months, when the program is over with I will have my choice of where to move next. Although I did not have the chance to visit Denver, CO that is my #1 pick preceeding my top 3 favorite cities in the ranking above. That brings me to my next rank:

The next North American travel destinations (cities):
1. Denver, CO/Boulder, CO
2. Victoria, BC
3. Milwaukee, WI

The next North American travel destinations (parks):
1. Grand Canyon NP (AZ)
2. Black Canyon of the Gunnison NP (CO)
3. Jasper NP (AB)

The analyst in me would love to continue to rank things, but I will stop after just one more, unless there is a request from one of my readers :)

Favorite Road Trip Albums
1. Paul Simon “Rhythm of the Saints”
2. Gorillaz “D-Sides”
3. Easy Star “Lonely Hearts Dub Band”


Okay, now is the exciting part of the blog. Here is a list of road trip facts. I even included a few charts for all my visually inclined stats lovin' friends. Enjoy!

13,715 ……………. Miles driven

1,317 ……………… Money spent on gas*

1,257 ……………… Pictures posted to FB (54% of total pictures taken)

740 ……………….. Mileage of longest drive (#8 to #9)

305 ……………….. Hours of driving*

88 …………………. Days on the road

60 …………………. Turkey sandwiches consumed*

41 ………………..... Different overnight stops made

41 ………………..... Mileage of shortest drive (#15 to #16)

34 ……………….... Hikes >1 mile*

27 ……………….... Average fuel economy (MPG)

26 ……………….... States visited

25 …………………. Nights camping (see chart below)



22 …………………. Longest time spent in one state (see chart below)



21 ………………….. National Parks visited

19 ………………….. Blogs, including this one

18 ………………….. New FB albums

17 ………………….. Mileage of longest hike

12 ………………….. Other significant stops not included in the tally of 41 stops

7 …………………... Times I paid for internet at Starbucks

6 …………………… People I got to play hookey

6 …………………… Different venues I sang karaoke at

5 …………………... Longest number of days without a shower

3 …………………… National Monuments visited

3 …………………… Paul Simon albums accumulated

2 …………………... Fellow road trippers I met who were also unemployed

2 …………………... Strip club visited

2 …………………… State Parks visited

2 …………………… Calls of mother nature answered in mother nature

2 …………………… Couchsurfers I stayed with

1 …………………… Music videos I starred in

1 …………………… National Forest visited

1 …………………… Times pulled over by a cop (I was not driving)

1 …………………… Times stayed with a cop

1 …………………… Times I flipped off an RV while passing on a dangerous curve

1 …………………… Times I got yelled at for driving like a Masshole

1 …………………… Times I got offered marijuana in a Gondola

1 …………………… Number of fast food stops when I actually bought something

0 …………………… Massachusetts license plates seen outside of New England

0 …………………… Speeding Tickets

0 …………………… Car Accidents

0 …………………… Animals injured

0 …………………… Injuries to self

0 …………………... Regrets
*Estimate

I will end on this note. I have absolutely no regrets about this road trip and if I had the chance to do it again I would, but I would do many things differently like perhaps try a ham or roast beef sandwich instead of turkey.